Halloween Musings

What a day! The ghosts, the goblins, witches, droves of sugared up children raiding the streets, costumes to choose, fake spiders and silly string to be had...Halloween is a fun holiday. I thought I'd sit down for a minute and reminisce about how I celebrated over the years.

One thing that struck me is how some costumes and get ups that were really cool when I was little, have lost their appeal. Times have changed. I guess everyone notices this when they get older but I am a child of the 80s. I remember when it was cool to want to dress up as Madonna or Michael Jackson. Don't get me started on Michael! Madonna? she has reinvented herself so many times since her days of being the Material Girl, I think it would confuse people to show up as a Kaballah, red bracelet wearing Esther(her new Jewish name) or the Goth, Hindu body-art wearing Madonna we loved in the nineties.

Here are a couple other random observations about Halloween:

1) What the heck are you passing out this year to trick-or-treators? If you are planning on passing out apples, pennies, or anything healthy (I once got a mini tube of toothpaste!) DON'T DO IT! If it is for the principle of doing something responsible atleast throw in something covered in chocolate as well. It is so disappointing for a child to have to fake their appreciation for this stuff. They spend the evening out in the cold, baring the elements, and bravely knocking on strangers doors. They have a goal and that is obtaining a large about of candy. Beware as well. Kids talk to eachother out there on the street. Your house will be branded as the place that is okay to skip and later in the night you'll be a big target for tipee! This goes for those who pass out gift certificates to MacDonalds or any icecream shop. Nothing is worse than being pimped by corporate America. Best to go with straight up candy.

2) Costumes? For kids, be creative. Don't dress up like Brittany Spears or Ashley Simpson. Belly mid-driffs and caked on make-up is not cool and it can be very cold out on the candy trail. Shame on your parents for letting you dress like a whore and shame on you for not portraying someone with a shred of talent. For college-aged and up, don't dress up as Austin Powers. I'm sick of going to Halloween costume parties and seeing like ten versions of him. It's over-done and annoying. Need ideas? classic cartoon characters(Flintstones, super hero's, smurfs), vampire, old lady, school girl, etc....

If you are not creative, be a ghost. All you need is a bed sheet. The ability to levitate is a bonus. I was once at this party and a person showed up as a ghost. No one knew who it was all night. Around 2a.m. when we it anymore we pulled it off to reveal this guy who we all though was out of town and he was dressed as a killer. It was very Scoobie Doo.

3) The art of passing out candy...These kids want their candy and they want it now. They will say thank you and might even explain their costumes for a minute or two. Saying that you would like them to do a trick is confusing and can have bad repercussions, this goes back to being a target as explained earlier. My friend and I were asked to do a trick once and we took the treator by surprise by my friend doing a handstand on their porch. She proceeded to land on a bush, knocking over three plants and cracking a few pots. She got sick from being upsidedown and proceeded to throw up on a rose bush. She didn't mean to do that of course but jokes on this treator, it was his fault for saying "trick".

Well that is all I have for now. Hope you are all safe tonight and enjoy!

Observations at Random...Flu, Flo, Flun

I am almost back to 100%. I spent all last week dooking it out with the stomach flu; hence the reason no one has heard or seen me in a few days. I had a hectic week before, so it was no surprise I got sick. As I was curled up in my make-shift bed on the tile of my bathroom floor in front of the porcelain thrown I had a little time to think:

When you have the stomach flu.....

1) Trying to "sweat out" a fever does not work and anyone who swears by it is sadistic!...I had a 101 degree temp and decided to go for a run. My younger brother does this a lot and swears it works. I got about a quarter mile away and even though I swore there was nothing left in my stomach after two days of emptying it, guess what?...if you can't guess you are lucky, it wasn't a Kodak moment but a very colorful trail.

2) The question "How are you feeling?" is pointless question proceeded by telling someone they "don't sound well". Thank you Captain Obvious! When the person on the other end of the phone line sounds like a cross between Elmer Fudd and AC/DC, why ask if they are sick?

3) Even now, MacGyver still facinates me! Richard Dean Anderson is a genious and a legend of syndication! While sacked out on the couch in the middle of the night I found the beloved show I watched in the 80's when I still french roled my jeans and played with a rubix cube. I still have no idea what the Pheonix Foundation is nor it's purpose and why MacGyver, a doctor of Physics, seems to be the go-to-guy to save the world from terrorism, espionage, and illegal drug trafficing. All of this of course done with a cup of yogurt and a number two pencil.

4) I love kids. They are great. After a few family gatherings though I wonder why parents insist on bringing them to get-togethers when they are running temps, snotty nosed, and cry most of the time they are there. A relative of mine insisted that their child needed to be included regardless because it was important to them. Mean old people coined the name "carrier monkey" for this reason. Please people, keep your sick kids in bed and home. I know who got me sick and next time I come down with something I am paying you a visit!

5) An apple a day does not keep the doctor away. In factI use to down tons of carrots so I wouldn't have to get glasses one day. Guess what? That was a lie too.

6) The best way to get people at work to leave you alone so you can get some work done is to tell them your still a little ill. Nobody came near my desk the whole day on Friday and kept the noise down so it would disturb me. They peaked in from time to time to ask me if I wanted tea, but I just added a little sad cough to make them extra skiddish.

7) Even though cough drop includes a small amount of alcohole, it is impossible to get any kind of buzz off of them from eating a bunch...mixing medications-especially expired ones is another story.

8) If it says to take one, take two. If it says for night-time only, take it anyway (always better to be unconsious and sick if you have no where to be). You forget what you say is half of the phone calls you have as well so the next time you see them is always an adventure. I also was thankful to be a bit out of it when the second half of the MSU game came on. That was a hard one to take, even with heavy sedation!

So yeah, on the mend and all for now!

Tis' this Season not the next one!

Attention all people decorating for Christmas....It's October 1st! Shelf that stuff for another two months, you yule obsessed psychos. Same with all retail outlets and stores, why are you displaying your over-priced, cheesy ornaments and gaudy sweaters so early? Yeah, I know its a money thing. I hate this. Every year it gets worse. There is this movement out there to begin the Christmas season earlier and earlier every year. On my drive into Lansing this morning I passed a place that is notorious for over-decorating with lights and plastic santas and reindeer to boot. When I say over decorating, I'm equating that to Martha Stewart on speed times twenty. Way too much going on in that yard.

Have these people no repect for the season we are in. Fall is my favorite. The leaves change and then fall. You get the fun of dressing up for Halloween, bobbing for apples, jumping in leaf piles, and drinking apple cider. There's football tailgating on campus, color tours up north, picking apples, deer hunting season....I could go on and on. Now I don't understand how anyone in good conscience live in Michigan and not appreciate all that the fall has to offer.

Right now is the big build up to Thanksgiving...not Christmas. Now that I think about it isn't Thanksgiving a more virtuous holiday anyway? Christmas you over load on greed while the worst you can do on Thanksgiving is glutiny. To counter this arguement though Thanksgiving is a historical reference to the Europeans interaction with the Native Americans and the Eurpoeans annilation of a race with disease and trickery.....so yeah scratch that idea.

This enry is a plea to all fellow normal people. Boycott this early holiday stuff. Everything goes on sale after Thanksgiving anyway. As for the guy decorating today, we should get a group together and go steal his Rudolf off his sleigh display!!